Okay, so this walking with Christ is going to demand a lot. In all the teachings we see that we have to give up worldly things for blessing and eternal life. In my reading of Not a Fan  by Kyle Idelman, I am seeing that this requires sacrifice.  Big sacrifice.

What about sin?
So the question came up at bible class last week about Sin. what are the Sin’s?   All of them.  Where is the list of Sins? Now these folks in my class have been on this path for years. I am new to it all.   I researched Sin I may need to make an entire page about it. The Ten Commandments. the Sermon on the Mount.  I am clickin’ away on the links (which I have shared under Christian Link: Resources)

Yikes! I am divorced.  I have cussed like a sailor all my life.  I still have to deal with lust and that is an hourly undertaking for me. (But I am getting better, each time i have to beg for forgiveness I get closer to managing it.) It is like finding it and identifying it. Then apologizing to Jesus and knowing you don’t want to have to do that all the time because it disappoints Him. Somehow this becomes self healing over time. But I I feel challenged and overwhelmed.  When I toy with the notion that this seems similar to brainwashing myself I realize it is just that!  I am washing my brain. I am cleansing with the help of the Lord. I am getting rid of things ideas feelings that can not lead to anything good. In my years on the planet… they have not.   It IS about sacrifice but it is also about reward.  While You cannot “See” the reward at the beginning.. it is about faith and the belief that the Word is the Way.

I have a long talk with girlfriend. We do not live together. Both divorced. So what about intimacy?
I have spent so many years convincing myself I was a “good person” But now I am learning it takes real discipline and I have so many old bad habits and “beliefs” I don’t want to “fool” myself again.

It is daunting. Even my weight and health Gluttony! a Sin!   So hard to get on that bike and push away from the table. I have indulged and fought and conquered so many addictive things in my life. these ones that are left are the ones I have not been able to win.  Help Me Jesus.

In Not a Fan, Idleman talks about Jesus wanting to turn our lives upside down! I am feelin’ it now. I am afraid I may not succeed.

I am going to have to take this just a step or two at a time. but my heart is right and I have been cleansed. I want to do this right. So much to change.

About Bibles
So now I have to learn the Word. Others in Bible class and at church can cite Chapter and verse for just about everything. I know my memory is not ever gonna be that good. I work to embrace and study. So I have shared some good Bible links too. I learned my King James Version I was gifted when I was confirmed in church as a teen is beautiful… but i cannot understand it. So may other versions that make sense. I bought everyone close to me a Bible at Easter. New Living Translation is my new one.  But I also discovered an  English Standard version that has neat Chapter  Introductions so I have a clue  who is writing what.  So much to learn.

About Words
In learning the Word, I have to learn the words. I never knew the true meaning of the word Grace. Now the lyrics of the song Amazing Grace have depth and meaning!

I never knew  that some Bibles are called Red letter editions, the words in red are the words that Jesus Christ spoke himself!

Secret Handshakes
I had volunteered as a greeter for one of the Easter services this past Spring. I know it is not enough to read and proclaim  but “Doing” is much a part of being a Christian.   As I smile and stand at the door and welcome people  a woman passes me and says. “Jesus is Risen“. I simply smiled but she was already past me.  I attended a later service and the Pastor remarked how in some European cultures when Christianity had to be more secretive.. the phrase “Jesus is Risen.”  is answered by another Christian as “He is Risen Indeed!”  sort of like a secret handshake.
Paschal Greeting

Now in all my clicking… I discover there is another Serbian greeting and response… this one used at Christmas.   Someone says “Christ is Born”  and the response is “Truly He is Born“.
Serbian traditions

I’ll be a better greeter this coming year. But how much more is there… I do not know?

Jews and Gentiles
I am baffled  just now about so much. I am learning that I know very little. But I want to know more. I grew up in a blue collar suburb of New York where we really were a melting pot of nationalities and faiths. I played and grew with Jews and Catholics, Italians and Polish. I was the only one with a Hispanic last name though the Hispanic culture was never part of my household. So I am a Gentile… yes? But sometimes the in the Bible Gentiles (non-Jews) are said to be Pagan or evil or bad.  Very confusing. So much to understand.

I resort back to the basic children’s song  Jesus loves me this I know.

Now I feel better.